Finally the "Pinata" shows up!

Baseball Season is finally on!

So we went into this season with more excitement than ever before because Brendon was #1 in stats all last year. We just knew it was going to be a great final year in Little League ! However, there is a but. Here it goes.....BUT.....the season has been in full swing for 6 weeks and 9 games down and Brendon has not a single hit. His last game he had full breakdown after a rough game and I was honestly surprised he didn't beg to quit.

Until today :)

Today we had a 10 team tournament. 1st time at bat, and Brendon steps up, first pitch, its a fast pitch, and he knocks it out of the park........... Freakin' WOOOHOO! He rounds the bases with a smile that we haven't seen since last season! After he makes it into the dougout, and after numerous butt whacks by his teamates (This practice confuses me...they will slap each other on the butts but refuse to sit right next to each other at the movies etc...??) his coach walked up to him and just said "FINALLY the Pinata shows up!". (To clarify his nickname is "Pinata" because he has been hit with more pitches then we can even count.)

But that's not it! His bat was on FIRE! And even though I could brag for hours, he ended up the day with 3 triples, 3 doubles, 2 singles, and the best Home-Run Ever made! The team ended up with 3rd place, but we now have reason to celebrate a hopefully happy rest of the season.

GO OTHO BASEBALL!!!!

Introducing

Here is the newest member of our family....Lily Peed.

We adopted her today, and didn't get to pick her name, but she is 1 1/2 and is a sweetheart. We have been searching for a Boxer for about 6 months. The best part is, Brendon is at camp but will arrive home Sunday night to his surprise!

Brendon looks more like.......

So in conversation with some friends today we were trying to decide who Brendon looks more like, Shane or I...... ummmm obviously those are the only 2 choices. Here are all 3 of our baby pics side by side. Any thoughts?

In Rememberance...

Today is a day to remember. I actually hope there will be no memory making moments today. Not because I don't want it to be special but because I want today for once, to not have anything to do with me.

Those who have been in my life that have passed on are few, but have left their words & wisdom impacted on my life and how I live it.

Pauline Peed
Your sweetness, your care, and your shuffling around the kitchen taking care of everyone. And who can ever forget that pot of chili when you grabbed the cinnamon instead of the chili powder. I would eat a bowl twice that size if to have lunch with you one more time. But most importantly I remember your voice saying out of the blue, and often....."God is so Good"
You are missed, but will see you again :)

Joyce Vance
Grandma, you left your mark. You were a lady with great strength and I had so much respect for you. You filled our summers with swimming, reading, sunning, and shopping! We would count the days until we would get to come to Arizona. Jen & I flying cross country alone with our name necklaces made with bright red string so you could spot us right when we got off the plane. The embarrassment of having to wear those paled in comparison to our excitement!
If I could let you know one thing it would be that it's not the sweater or necklace that you bought me that I remember most, it is all the lunches we shared after an afternoon of shopping and the dinners on your patio in the lazy Arizona evenings. I listened, and I learned, and I know that in the times I know you wanted to choke me for dumb decisions, your admonishment was always speaking in the back of my mind, and helped me find my way. I treat myself to a banana malt when I am missing you and I hope I make you proud.

Bill Vance
You have only been gone a few short years so it is still you I miss the most. You had a quiet strength and I have never met anyone who I respect more than you.

When I was little, my best friend Luke & I were raking leaves into a jumping pile but we only had one rake. He was a boy and was obviously doing it wrong so I innocently enough pointed that fact out. This set off the classic game of "I'm better than you". He proclaimed in his dumb boy way that "his dad owned the hardware store so he was the most important in Fort Dodge!". I knew I had him beat "Well my grandpa owns the bank so that makes him the richest man in the world!"

OK, so I got it a little wrong. I think I owe Luke an apology. But that's how I saw you grandpa, the best in the world.

When grandma would take us shopping, you would drive (thank God you would drive!) and patiently wait for us. Grandma would treat us to lunch, but you would treat us to ice cream later. You let us drive the golf cart around....sorry we speed raced with it. Thanks for the car buying advice even though at the time it was really hard to admit I got taken for a ride. You showed me that the right way isn't always the easiest way. That's an important lesson to learn.

I remember a dinner we shared not long before you got sick in which Shane & I were about to celebrate our 10 year anniversary. I asked you how in a world of dime store divorces you & grandma made it over 50 years. You said, "we never fought and when we did I always got the last word!". I was shocked! You did? You went on to say "I ended any & all arguments with these 2 words...."Yes Dear". I wish Shane was there to take notes :) You told me to chose my battles wisely, and I do...most of the time :)

At your funeral I was proud to hear all the stories of how you helped people out. People who would have never been where they are today without you. You never told us any of this! But, you wouldn't talk about about how great a man you were, great men never do.
You were very respected and well thought of...... how could you not be.

There is a proverb that says "A good name is more valuable than all the worlds silver and gold". Hmmmm, that makes me think..... maybe I don't owe Luke an apology. You were the richest man in the world, and I am so much richer for knowing you.
Thank-you.

P.S. I will visit the cemetery with Maxine today, and after the reading of the WWII vets and hunting down your flagpole, we will be remembering you with Hot Fudge Sundays at Dairy Queen :)

Im just a girl

So my car has been acting up the last month. I will be driving down the road, foot on the gas, and my car will just shut off. It has happened at stop signs, in the ATM drive up, and also in the parking lot of my sons school at the exact moment his way cute "friend that just happens to be a girl and her cell# showed up on my last months text bill 783 times" was being dropped off. I usually just have to pull over and it starts right back up, so I figure I got some crappy gas and it will flush itself out.....

WRONG!

Before I explain the problem I feel I should reinforce 5 important facts to remember:
1. I am a girl
2. Cars are extremely complex pieces of equipment that can, and should, only be handled by a certified professional
3. a $15,000 car should tell you if it is in need of something
4. It took me three times to pass the drivers ed test
5. I am a girl

With that in mind......I will proceed...
So my car dies today on my way to get a Grande Mocha Frappachino. I put it in park and turned the key ....it does not start....so I try again...no start. OMG! I am stranded and there are people staring at me and mouthing words I cannot repeat. I get honked at to move. I'm thinking "Seriously, do you honestly think I just parked 14' from the stop sign in the middle of the busy road?" I start freaking out because I HATE people staring at me. I start silently swearing in my head, then I pray, then I decide I can't really be cussing at the same time I'm praying because that's just wrong, I cant find my phone to call my husband because it is buried underneath my a pink oil change notice in my purse, and I am sweating like its 140 degrees because I am freaking out.
Finally, and by finally I mean like 17 seconds after the stall, a car pulls over driven by a guy who resembles "The Hulk" and asks me if he can push me around the corner. All of Moms lessons about NOT talking to strangers were quickly wrenched over to the smart part of my brain and I practically hugged him and granted him the right to rename my child.
The air must have exploded with "Machoness" because 2 other guys quickly jumped out of their cars and started to help. They push me around the corner and I proceed to thank them and explain that my mechanic, who works just around the corner is on his way, which was a lie, but I just felt so stupid and really just wanted my husband there to fix it and the testosterone levels were making me a little uneasy. These guys proceeded to pop the hood and start grunting and pointing at things and speaking some other "broken car lets fix it" language. They are twisting & turning & checking gauge thingies, and end up looking at some sensor that shuts the car off when the car has no oil. One of them pulls a metal rod out of this tiny little hole, and loudly proclaims....."Ummm, you have no oil in your car". They turned to me with a "we are so embarrassed to have pushed you around the corner because you are too dumb to put oil in your car" look.
If it wasn't official before, I was now winning the award for girl idiot of the year.
The Hulk opens his trunk, grabs a quart of oil, puts it in and tells me to drive to my mechanics and get an oil change. He grabs the little "Oil Change Reminder notice" that is prominently displayed in the corner of my windshield and checks what the mileage was last oil change, looks at my current mileage and says....."you should have changed your oil 8,000 miles ago".
"ummm.......ok"
My husband is now pulling in and The Hulk explains the problem to him, he looks at me like he doesn't know who I am and acts like he is just pulling over to help. I glare at him, he shoots me a look like hes gonna kill me for almost blowing up my car, so I sheepishly retreat to my car and it starts right up.
I hurry back to the office, I'm thinking I should be making a quick detour to the church to repent for my "lying & cussing" ways. I am feeling lousy and really stupid, and I never did get my Frappachino.
I ultimately decide to stop at Younkers on the way home because I deserve a new pair of shoes for all of my stress and this whole thing is really Shane fault because.....I'm just a girl who barely passed drivers ed and he was fully aware of this when he married me.

Boys will be..toxic

I don't understand boys. I think they are gross.

I'm not quite sure how I ever started thinking that boys were good for anything. I'm pretty sure there is a great conspiracy to spike milk cartons with some sort of female blinding agent in all Middle School cafeterias across the nation. I have been married for almost 13 years, have a 12 year old son AND I still am amazed at the disgusting and embarrassing things they do. If I would have only known then what I know now.

Last Thursday night I was in the mood for Pancakes & Bacon for dinner. I believe Breakfast food tastes even better when its served during traditinoal non-breakfast hours. I think its the rebellious side of me......OMG we are having Little Sizzlers after 11am....close the blinds and turn the lights down everyone! So I flip 6 pancakes onto a plate and take it to the table for Brendon to start eating, I walk back to the kitchen, all of 5 steps, grab the plate of bacon, turn around, 5 steps back, and only 3 pancakes left....Im NOT exaggerating. He had picked up the pancakes, rolled them like a tortilla, dragged it thru the syrup, and shoved it in. No Fork, No napkin, syrup everywhere, and then says, "ME WANT MORE" with pancake chunks & syrup dripping out of the corners of his mouth .UHG! I have taught you manners! You're wife is going to HATE me!

Later, dishes done, syrup wiped off the table, chair,wall and ceiling, we are downstairs watching the tube and Shane rips one. This was no accident, this is a nightly planned event. Shane is quite dramatic when it comes the release of bodily gases. He pulls off his blanket, leans like the eiffel towel, raises his leg, squints and pushes. Its LOUD, all the time...very Loud. It's digusting! I bury my nose in my blanket, and hear the same thing, every time, the same line..."Honey did you hear that?" My sister in Florida could hear that. Poor Mrs. Helen next door is assuring her half deaf husband that they must just be blasting at the mines again. What does he think I dont hear him? What is the response to this? Am I suppose to rate it? "That ones an 8 honey, make it jucier sounding if you want a higher score". Then like a broken record..."Can you smell it". Ummm... "yeah". I'm already on my way to get the protective masks out of the bathroom cupboard, but I cant because Brendon is coming out of there looking relieved, spraying my Yankee candle Buttercream air freshner and proclaiming "You dont want to go in there for a few hours Mom" GEEZ! Yankee Candle does not have the ability to cover up your nasty butt smell! I open the window to let fresh air in, search for the Lysol, and hear them downwstairs arguing on who smells the worse. "Mom.....dad says his fart made you throw up a little in your mouth....go smell the bathroom and tell me if mines worse".

I cant win
Whats a girl to do?

How I was almost killed by trying to purchase a Grannysmith

Its true...purchasing apples about netted me a one way trip to my eternal resting place.

First I need to explain that I have had this blog for a few weeks but have not yet been inspired to...well...blog. I read my cousin Brookes' blog often and her wittiness and tale telling abilities have left me laughing uncontrollably and fondly reminiscing of my "Big Hair" days where she supposedly thought I was cooler than a freshly made Mango Margarita. However facing death, or at minimum, the loss of an important limb, has made me see the light!

You see, I was shopping at our local Hy-Vee grocery store, WITH my "I'm totally Re-Usable" green grocery bag (aren't you proud of me Brooke) when I noticed a very large group of people hovering with their carts around a large display. As I took a few more steps I then noticed a large banner the color of hot pink proclaiming "Soda 6-paks for .99." WOW! The accountant side of my brain went "hmm...divide by 6....minus a 1....add the 2...is there a deposit....well whatever thats CHEAP! "
I am all about a good deal so I grabbed a cart, carefully wiping the handle with a disinfectant wipe because, well, they are phyfellocouscous breeding grounds, and headed over to claim this "Deal of the Day". The closer I got, the clearer the picture became. This wasn't just ANY group of people hovering, this was the group of people that have been playing hookie from their Weight Watchers meetings for at least 8 months working skillfully alongside the Jennie Craig dropouts. Scanning the scene for an opening, I surveyed a 14-year old, gangly, 98 lb. stock boy sweating profusly as he tried to unload his skid of soda cans onto the display but was miserably unable to keep up. Chicken legs wobbling under the intense pressure, the realization seemed to be setting in that he was in fact outnumbered. I wanted to scream"Hold your ground Boy" but who am I kidding, I am no General Patton. These Mongers were overtaking the stockboys skid! Has the economy crashed and this is the last shipment of Diet Rite? My instincts kicked in and I realized......we have really been on a smoothie kick in the Peed household anyway.

Moving along the outskirts, and out of any immediate danger, I carefully swung my cart to the fresh produce aisle and began to scout the apples for the aforementioned smoothies. This was my thought process, "Hmm, Fuji for baking, Honeycrisp for sauce, Oohh those GrannySmiths look great, Why is that large woman waddling at an amazingly fast pace right towards me?" Scanning my surroundings I understood.... I had made a grave error. The confines of that large group of low-calorie challanged people would have been safer. At least within their midst the most that could have happened would be to get bumped, pinched between fat rolls, or groped by a sweaty janitor who had taken a break from watching Star Trek to make the sale. I had managed instead to position myself directly in the path of a 300 lb. woman who had just noticed the hot pink soda sale sign.
Oh My God!
The mini me in my conscience yelled GET OUT OF THE WAY, but I froze. I was stuck between the Granny Smiths and the fresh cut watermelon! This woman was barrelling down on me, driving her cart like it was stolen, so intent on fufilling her fantasy afternoon of sipping soda after soda, eating a jumbo frozen pizza and watching Oprah she didnt see she was about to crash into me. I had 4 seconds, maybe 6 if she started to get tired and needed to lean (it is a long walk from the parking lot) so I closed my eyes...one...two...three...did I put on clean underwear..mom said thats impor....WHOOSH!!!! My hair flew up, my cart slammed into my cute new brown leather boots, and an overwhelming smell of peanut butter cups and Doritos filled the air. I opened my eyes, fully expecting St. Peter to be greeting me, but instead....only apples. OMG Im still here and I only have a small black skid mark accross my boot and the wheel on my cart is a little wobbly. I SURVIVED!
Forget groceries, I was stopping at Tropical Smoothie on the way home, the only hazard there would be the potential confrontation by a health nut intent on admonishing me for me putting real sugar and not Splenda into my ISLAND FEVER smoothie. I grabbed a few necessities, loaded them into my sack, and limped my way to the checkout. While standing there patiently waiting for the woman in front of me to pay for her steak, chips, 37 6-packs of soda, and a HEALTY WOMAN magazine I was amused my the irony of it all. I smiled at her overweight but very cute baby sucking on a Twix Bar and drooling all over the cart handle and made a mental note to myself "Always wipe the handle of your grocery store cart and never stand between a 300 lb person and thier Diet Rite"