In Rememberance...

Today is a day to remember. I actually hope there will be no memory making moments today. Not because I don't want it to be special but because I want today for once, to not have anything to do with me.

Those who have been in my life that have passed on are few, but have left their words & wisdom impacted on my life and how I live it.

Pauline Peed
Your sweetness, your care, and your shuffling around the kitchen taking care of everyone. And who can ever forget that pot of chili when you grabbed the cinnamon instead of the chili powder. I would eat a bowl twice that size if to have lunch with you one more time. But most importantly I remember your voice saying out of the blue, and often....."God is so Good"
You are missed, but will see you again :)

Joyce Vance
Grandma, you left your mark. You were a lady with great strength and I had so much respect for you. You filled our summers with swimming, reading, sunning, and shopping! We would count the days until we would get to come to Arizona. Jen & I flying cross country alone with our name necklaces made with bright red string so you could spot us right when we got off the plane. The embarrassment of having to wear those paled in comparison to our excitement!
If I could let you know one thing it would be that it's not the sweater or necklace that you bought me that I remember most, it is all the lunches we shared after an afternoon of shopping and the dinners on your patio in the lazy Arizona evenings. I listened, and I learned, and I know that in the times I know you wanted to choke me for dumb decisions, your admonishment was always speaking in the back of my mind, and helped me find my way. I treat myself to a banana malt when I am missing you and I hope I make you proud.

Bill Vance
You have only been gone a few short years so it is still you I miss the most. You had a quiet strength and I have never met anyone who I respect more than you.

When I was little, my best friend Luke & I were raking leaves into a jumping pile but we only had one rake. He was a boy and was obviously doing it wrong so I innocently enough pointed that fact out. This set off the classic game of "I'm better than you". He proclaimed in his dumb boy way that "his dad owned the hardware store so he was the most important in Fort Dodge!". I knew I had him beat "Well my grandpa owns the bank so that makes him the richest man in the world!"

OK, so I got it a little wrong. I think I owe Luke an apology. But that's how I saw you grandpa, the best in the world.

When grandma would take us shopping, you would drive (thank God you would drive!) and patiently wait for us. Grandma would treat us to lunch, but you would treat us to ice cream later. You let us drive the golf cart around....sorry we speed raced with it. Thanks for the car buying advice even though at the time it was really hard to admit I got taken for a ride. You showed me that the right way isn't always the easiest way. That's an important lesson to learn.

I remember a dinner we shared not long before you got sick in which Shane & I were about to celebrate our 10 year anniversary. I asked you how in a world of dime store divorces you & grandma made it over 50 years. You said, "we never fought and when we did I always got the last word!". I was shocked! You did? You went on to say "I ended any & all arguments with these 2 words...."Yes Dear". I wish Shane was there to take notes :) You told me to chose my battles wisely, and I do...most of the time :)

At your funeral I was proud to hear all the stories of how you helped people out. People who would have never been where they are today without you. You never told us any of this! But, you wouldn't talk about about how great a man you were, great men never do.
You were very respected and well thought of...... how could you not be.

There is a proverb that says "A good name is more valuable than all the worlds silver and gold". Hmmmm, that makes me think..... maybe I don't owe Luke an apology. You were the richest man in the world, and I am so much richer for knowing you.
Thank-you.

P.S. I will visit the cemetery with Maxine today, and after the reading of the WWII vets and hunting down your flagpole, we will be remembering you with Hot Fudge Sundays at Dairy Queen :)

Im just a girl

So my car has been acting up the last month. I will be driving down the road, foot on the gas, and my car will just shut off. It has happened at stop signs, in the ATM drive up, and also in the parking lot of my sons school at the exact moment his way cute "friend that just happens to be a girl and her cell# showed up on my last months text bill 783 times" was being dropped off. I usually just have to pull over and it starts right back up, so I figure I got some crappy gas and it will flush itself out.....

WRONG!

Before I explain the problem I feel I should reinforce 5 important facts to remember:
1. I am a girl
2. Cars are extremely complex pieces of equipment that can, and should, only be handled by a certified professional
3. a $15,000 car should tell you if it is in need of something
4. It took me three times to pass the drivers ed test
5. I am a girl

With that in mind......I will proceed...
So my car dies today on my way to get a Grande Mocha Frappachino. I put it in park and turned the key ....it does not start....so I try again...no start. OMG! I am stranded and there are people staring at me and mouthing words I cannot repeat. I get honked at to move. I'm thinking "Seriously, do you honestly think I just parked 14' from the stop sign in the middle of the busy road?" I start freaking out because I HATE people staring at me. I start silently swearing in my head, then I pray, then I decide I can't really be cussing at the same time I'm praying because that's just wrong, I cant find my phone to call my husband because it is buried underneath my a pink oil change notice in my purse, and I am sweating like its 140 degrees because I am freaking out.
Finally, and by finally I mean like 17 seconds after the stall, a car pulls over driven by a guy who resembles "The Hulk" and asks me if he can push me around the corner. All of Moms lessons about NOT talking to strangers were quickly wrenched over to the smart part of my brain and I practically hugged him and granted him the right to rename my child.
The air must have exploded with "Machoness" because 2 other guys quickly jumped out of their cars and started to help. They push me around the corner and I proceed to thank them and explain that my mechanic, who works just around the corner is on his way, which was a lie, but I just felt so stupid and really just wanted my husband there to fix it and the testosterone levels were making me a little uneasy. These guys proceeded to pop the hood and start grunting and pointing at things and speaking some other "broken car lets fix it" language. They are twisting & turning & checking gauge thingies, and end up looking at some sensor that shuts the car off when the car has no oil. One of them pulls a metal rod out of this tiny little hole, and loudly proclaims....."Ummm, you have no oil in your car". They turned to me with a "we are so embarrassed to have pushed you around the corner because you are too dumb to put oil in your car" look.
If it wasn't official before, I was now winning the award for girl idiot of the year.
The Hulk opens his trunk, grabs a quart of oil, puts it in and tells me to drive to my mechanics and get an oil change. He grabs the little "Oil Change Reminder notice" that is prominently displayed in the corner of my windshield and checks what the mileage was last oil change, looks at my current mileage and says....."you should have changed your oil 8,000 miles ago".
"ummm.......ok"
My husband is now pulling in and The Hulk explains the problem to him, he looks at me like he doesn't know who I am and acts like he is just pulling over to help. I glare at him, he shoots me a look like hes gonna kill me for almost blowing up my car, so I sheepishly retreat to my car and it starts right up.
I hurry back to the office, I'm thinking I should be making a quick detour to the church to repent for my "lying & cussing" ways. I am feeling lousy and really stupid, and I never did get my Frappachino.
I ultimately decide to stop at Younkers on the way home because I deserve a new pair of shoes for all of my stress and this whole thing is really Shane fault because.....I'm just a girl who barely passed drivers ed and he was fully aware of this when he married me.